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Saturday, February 12, 2011

Tough Love for teenagers continues

In November I wrote about going to my first Tough Love Support group meeting. I have been to several meetings since then and now feel very at home in this supportive environment. Each week this group offers support and an opportunity to debrief after a challenging week with a troubled teenager. Also each week there is an opportunity to learn more about how we communicate with each other. last week was my turn to research a topic and present it to the group. It wasn't such a daunting task as it involved reading through the book and finding an area which was of interest to me, something that I could share with the group.

One of the subjects I chose to speak about was Personal Power.

Personal Power - ability to control your own life and influence your own environment. It is NOT about controlling others and making them do what you want.

Personal Power is about
• Making choices
• Developing alternatives
• Setting limits
• Refusing to be treated inconsiderately
• Developing support for yourself
• Acting rather than reacting
• Giving up taking responsibility for others
• Giving up accepting consequences for others

Near the end of the chapter that I had researched were the following words


These words resonated with me as did the words of our support group leader when he spoke about valuing ourselves.

I suddenly realised that I had actually been trying to seek approval from all of my teenagers for the decisions that I needed to make. Time to rethink, regain strength and value myself as a parent and as a person.